wisdom

A Certain Kind of Solitude

~ Emma

A certain kind of solitude my soul requires.
Silent but full of sound. Quietly loud.
A way for the mind to rest among raging fires.
The burden of people, is it shameful? I am sometimes not proud.

Proud I am though of what I know of what I need.
It’s simple and beautiful and kind and uncluttered.
It’s pure, honest, a chosen loneliness, my good deed.
The seagulls arrive, the crows walk with me, the wings they are fluttered.

Water is a sacred vessel, a portal, a connection to the divine.
My spirit swims and dances and forges a path against the grind.
Leave your words inside, don’t clutter my mind, I resign.
Hydrated with silence, not isolation, not fearful avoidance, but a found that I always find.

To watch the leaves, to sing with the sea, to listen to animals.
Have you heard the voice of an orca, the greeting of a feline, the dialogue of a goose?
The creatures that delight us, teach us, need us, require so minimal.
When you strip it down, let it go, stop asking, stop waiting, stop talking, stop needing, that’s the juice.

Take a walk, call yourself on the phone, talk to her, listen to her, be her hero.
A certain kind of solitude holds no mystery, no questions, requires no logic.
To share and bring forth the gifts from within: abandon the recipe, begin with zero.
Depletion is mended by repletion from the elements, the true magic.

Do not tell me when you have never been keen. You can never know what has never been.
Push to fill a space and a hole that was never meant to be filled.
The hole is beauty, it’s sacrifice, it’s bold, it’s a story that is deserved to be seen.
The comfort in a space so vibrant, so sure, so opposing, it is warm and never chilled.

No more apologies, time to raise the vibration and take the leap.
The song my heart sings breaks the heart of the ones who’ve tried to listen.
Leave me to my open windows, breezes, sunsets, cats, books, my friends who help me sleep, the sheep.
Caring so deeply, giving so much, my heart knows nothing but to glisten.

But for that I need to awaken, to rest my feet, to hear less the opinion.
To be surrounded by clouds and tides, less footsteps and pride.
The device is soon to be forgotten, but I am still a civilian.
Inside a place where fog meets ship, clear the passage, I do not hide.

Old Soul

~ Emma

Old soul here is a story.

You came to me, I came to you, today in this time because our souls were together once before in a past time. You feel what you do, I feel what I do because we have felt this before. It’s something inside of us that is familiar, but also beyond both of us. I know you, you know me.

We were together on a ship out at sea.

There were many others on the ship and there were catastrophic storms, illnesses and grief. We latched onto each other and took to work holding, healing, tending to, and protecting the ones around us during hardship. We were the strong ones looking out for them.

As the winds blew, the ship rocked, the waves surmounting the boat, the rain torrentially hitting, soaking, freezing, we did not stop. We saved many fellow shipmen, but some we could not. I always felt deep pain for the ones we lost. The pain lasted weeks, months, from not being able to save them all. It’s why I am who I am.

At the end of each treacherous day, you and I would comfort each other. After giving our energy, using our resources, applying our care, we would sit down in a corner. A special corner. This is a memory I am not sure why and how I have but it’s there. Wet, cold, hungry and embraced.

We would sit in this corner under a blanket drinking in each other’s warmth. I was huddled inside you, your arms wrapped around me and we were inside a cocoon regenerating one another’s vibration. Protecting ourselves from those around us for just a moment, to stop, to breathe, to give one another comfort and solace. We were tired. So exhausted from fighting the storms, battling the rages and helping to keep the ship afloat so everyone felt as safe as possible. Hoping always to make it to that wondrous shore off in the distance. Land. Sand. Trees. Fresh water. Land animals. A better life. The two of us were nominated the care takers of this ship, the givers, the knowers and the bringers of light and humour during fearful times. We wore the badges proudly.

The day we met in this life, before thinking, before knowing, I gave you a glass of water out of instinct and it was the only thought, the only action, the only understanding that I had in that moment that felt necessary. I must give him water to drink.

It has so much meaning to me now after being reunited with this story. When I looked at you it was as if I had quenched your thirst before and this was just a reenactment of where we had once been. It is a story written many, many years ago and it’s why, we will always be connected and protecting each other from wherever we are during whatever storms we may face. We are experienced and we are stronger because of one another.

It’s why letting go feels strange.

Because we were latched so tightly, so deeply, and in such meaningful position and purpose once before, that deep inside it’s a recognition difficult to separate from. But it is wonderful to know and to understand. There is beauty in it. But letting go of it, doesn’t undo what we did, what we have, and the impact we made. Remembering being in that corner of the ship with you, it carries me, reminds me and sends me forward with a force that I am blessed to have.

This story is not untrue.

It is the very truth of a past life experience that I have ever felt and known. The ship, the people, the blanket, the cold, the rain, the waves, the storms, the raging sea, the darkness, the light, the stars, the stillness, it’s all a part of me. And it is a part of you.

The way the moon and its light cared for us, directing our path and leading us exactly here. You are drawn to look up at the sky as am I. It’s what we did. We knew we were being guided well by the stars and so still, we are. We trust and we know.

I hope this story brings to you the feelings and sensations that it brings to me. Deep wisdom, peace, ignited spiritual energy and the most powerful resilience there is.

Brave One

~ Emma

My love you can see and you can know.
I sat up all night thinking how is it so.
It doesn’t feel like much maybe, but I need you to know.
The way you are, the grit on your cheeks, the fear in your bones, the glass over your heart, it’s heavenly oh.

You aren’t the boy in the yard, or the lost one who is alone.
You have delicate ears, soft eyes, rough hands and a soul of stone.
The world has been bothersome and you chose beat over bone.
Beautiful and sweet, pure and kind, grasping to own.

The dust around your body, the particles placing you astray, just wash them away.
There’s a warmth, a cold, a warmth, a cold, just try and stay, just today, okay?
You are protected by the special ones, to that I am one, you can play.
Different shades, green and yellow, purple and black, no matter, they’re colours all the same, tones created from fray.

Lifting and moving, rolling and sliding you are more than tools, silt and trucks.
You are lightning and strength and sensitive forces inherited from the mucks.
The windows are always open you can choose what to breathe, it doesn’t have to suck.
Without the blocks there is nothing to know how to surrender to and survive… shucks.

The giving from your hand and the easy way you go, the wind sweeping into your nose, you appease.
I listen from all the way over here, I can hear the woe and the yearn to please.
The last time you spoke, it was a goodbye that will rest far out wide and down in the depths of many seas.

I will always be watching you, my eyes scan the valleys and search the caves.
Listen not to the ones who hold defence, who let compassion slide, who can’t see inside, who enjoy the rave.
Your tired mind, your stretched emotions, listen less to them, be brave.
The sparkle in your chest, you can rely and listen, you know what’s gone, and what you gave.